I'm sorry I'm late, and nearly anything I could think has already been said. I agree in particular with Elise_Wanderer (and what a gorgeous cheering-up gift BTW!) and Lula, in the sense that you probably should firstly try to sort things out with yourself. Why do you do what you do for these people, what are you expecting from them, how are your expectations likely to be met. THEN you should confront them, keeping in mind that you are a wonderful person and don't deserve to be dismissed or treated poorly. I wouldn't tell them how "they make you feel" (it would only add to their feeling indebted and could even result in more hurt - I experience this with my son: when he feels guilty he becomes aggressive and says things he doesn't really think, just for defence) but rather, and very sternly, how "you expect to be treated" - speaking of the hurt might come later, once things have been settled somehow and you are safely into a rational exchange.
Besides the differences in character, nurturing aspects vs. need for "me-time," etc. there's another point I've learned with time, i.e. that any tangible 'give' (like favours done, time spent helping, and, worst of all, money lent) often generates the opposite effect in the receiver. They feel grateful, but they also feel indebted, and have no idea how to reciprocate, nor, which is worse, how the giver is expecting them to reciprocate. It's like they are afraid the giver has a right to ask more than they are prepared to allow in return - and they usually take the coward way out. I'm not saying that people do that consciously, but at times it's easier to deal with fish and hook or with gardening than with people, in particular when there are layers of unspoken feelings involved.
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THEN you should confront them, keeping in mind that you are a wonderful person and don't deserve to be dismissed or treated poorly. I wouldn't tell them how "they make you feel" (it would only add to their feeling indebted and could even result in more hurt - I experience this with my son: when he feels guilty he becomes aggressive and says things he doesn't really think, just for defence) but rather, and very sternly, how "you expect to be treated" - speaking of the hurt might come later, once things have been settled somehow and you are safely into a rational exchange.
Besides the differences in character, nurturing aspects vs. need for "me-time," etc. there's another point I've learned with time, i.e. that any tangible 'give' (like favours done, time spent helping, and, worst of all, money lent) often generates the opposite effect in the receiver. They feel grateful, but they also feel indebted, and have no idea how to reciprocate, nor, which is worse, how the giver is expecting them to reciprocate.
It's like they are afraid the giver has a right to ask more than they are prepared to allow in return - and they usually take the coward way out. I'm not saying that people do that consciously, but at times it's easier to deal with fish and hook or with gardening than with people, in particular when there are layers of unspoken feelings involved.
*squishes you*